Dear Kingdom Worker,
I see you there. . . I see your hurried schedule. You are light on sleep. . . the load is feeling very heavy and those legs of yours are feeling weak. I see your messy kitchen from the meals you made for the funeral dinner, bible study group, new mom, or that church member coming home from the hospital today. I see you reach up to massage your temple – – that light headache is a roaring hurricane after your turn at nursery duty this morning. I saw how messy you left your house so you could rush to fill in at the after school ministry. Your heart was aching to see your son before he fell asleep. . . and you missed it again because one of your bible study girls was feeling lost tonight and God called you to be her compass.
And then there’s the voice. . . the one you try not to listen to but it rings through your soul just the same – echoing off the darkest places and then resting in the front of your mind. it’s not really worth it. . . why are you doing all this anyway. . . you have enough to do with your job/family/school schedule/fill in the blank. . . you have served enough. . . worked enough. . . you do enough. . .
That voice wants you to be comfortable. That voice wants your to do list to be peacefully accomplished. That voice wants your every selfish desire to be fulfilled. That voice wants grieving families to wonder where God is when none of his people show up to provide food and comfort. That voice wants young, overwhelmed mothers to exhaust themselves getting their families ready for church and then wonder why they bothered because His house is void of the love and support they need. . . because they won’t hear five minutes of that sermon anyway. That voice wants the after school ministry to fail because there isn’t enough help and the few workers they have are exhausted and overwhelmed. That voice wants teenage girls to get terribly lost and stay that way because there is no one older and wiser to grab a flashlight and illuminate the path.
So please know this. Your Father in Heaven sees you. He sees your effort.. He sees your heart. He sees your obedience. He sees your sacrifice. He sees the worship and gratefulness that led you to serve in ministry in the first place. And you may not see it today or tomorrow or even in your lifetime. But He is taking your investment and He is growing His Kingdom. He is deepening your faith and your character and your perserverance. He feels loved. He feels honored. He feels worshiped. He is protecting you from the voice of the enemy. He is making your path straight. He is preparing the way for you. He is protecting you and your family from any strain that His Kingdom work could leave you vulnerable to. Your faith is made real because it is lived out in the sweat and blood and passion that comes with personal ministry. It is worth it. You are doing this because you love The Lord and because there will never be enough to compare with what your savior has done for you. And no, you do not do this for a reward. But be assured – a great reward is coming. A time when you will hear “Well Done, my good and faithful servant.” Living a life worthy of the calling is not easy. . . but I know that I know that I know in the very depth of my soul. . . the spirit whispers “it is worth it”
So press on. . . . Lean in. . . He is calling. . . It matters how we answer. Even when it feels like it doesn’t matter at all.